Should Wine Come With A Warranty?

I recently purchased an HD Camcorder that I am going to use to do some video features for foodandwineblog.com (more to come!). I bought the camera from an online store and a few days after it arrived, I received an e-mail from the retailer offering an extended warranty plan at about 1/5 of the cost of the camera. After weighing in the cost of the coverage, the chance of the camera breaking, and the price of replacing this exact camera in 3 years, I decided to pass on the warranty.

I have to admit though, I am a big fan of warranties. When Kim bought her car a few years back (a 2 year old Rav-4) I talked her into getting an extended service plan (30,000 miles) for around $1200 which covers just about everything. It’s nice to know that for another year or so, if the engine or transmission goes on the car we’re all set thanks to our trusted warranty.

I also recently bought a new HP Laptop for photo and video editing, and Kim and I also just renovated our kitchen- all new appliances and over $6000 spent at Home Depot…all with warranties. Warranties make me feel cozy, warm, and secure. I sleep better at night knowing that if my new washing machine ceases to wash, I can call the Maytag guy who will come over and make everything right. Both my worries and dirty underwear will be all taken care of.

But what about other products, such as my wine? Still being in the early stages of collecting, I tend to buy and store wines that are under $100 so I can buy a few bottles and watch them develop over a few years. We all know that 1 in 10 or 15 botltes of wine are “corked” (meaning they are spoiled as a result of contact with the molecule TCA - corked wines smell like wet cardboard and taste bland and rather odd). For someone who buys only 1 or two bottles of a nice wine ($30, $50, $200 or more!) to cellar for a few years, it’s quite the risk that the investment may be worthless from the beginning. What other product would we consumers allow such a high failure rate? Or is it an inherent risk when buying something that is alive, with a finite shelf-life, that the product may be doomed beyond your control (caveat emptor)?

On a brief aside, whenever I think of warranties I think of the mid 1990’s comedy Tommy Boy (tribute from YouTube below). There is a scene in the movie where an auto parts store is considering carrying the brake pads made by Callahan Auto who is run by a seemingly incompetent buffoon (Tommy) played by Chris Farley. When the store manager finds there is no warranty on the Callahan box, he shows concern adding that customers want to feel warm and fuzzy, and sleep well knowing they are covered. Tommy argues that competitors only put warranties on their products because they are inferior, and adds “If you want me to take a dump in a box and mark guaranteed on it, I’ll do it… I’ve got spare time.”

In a time when just about everything comes with a warranty, why shouldn’t wine? Perhaps one option would be to offer an “extended service plan” that would give coverage over corked/spoiled wines for a 5-10 year term. Pretty simple actually, since all my electronics have similar policies. Granted, there is the argument that wines that are spoiled become so due to improper storage conditions on the consumer end. This could be prevented by the warranty only providing “corked” coverage- since TCA is an issue on the winery end of things (from the vineyard or corks).

Most (good) retailers do offer an exchange or return for a wine that is spoiled or corked as long as it was purchased recently. I’ve returned a bottle up to three or four months later due to high levels of TCA. But what about the single bottle of 2001 Valdicava Brunello di Montalcino Riserva I have laying down in the cellar for at least 6 more years? At $175 on release (and over $350 now), I doubt I’ll be willing to replace it if this one’s a failure. I also doubt that my trusted wine shop will be willing to take the loss in 2014 (if it’s still around)- considering that the bottle will most likely go up even more in value and may be very hard to replace. Perhaps the folks at the winery will be so kind to send me a new bottle if this one is corked? My guess is probably not.

Should wine come with a warranty that it will not be corked (is this even feasible)? Would you be more likely to buy a higher end wine if you were guaranteed a bottle that wasn’t corked? Or, is this just a silly idea, and a case of caveat emptor? Perhaps the buyer must accept the risk that the product may be spoiled and take his or her loss in stride. After all, consumers have the option to purchase wines sealed with non-cork closures (screw caps) to further reduce risk of a corked bottle of wine.

Feasible? Idiotic? Revolutionary? Am I the only one buying any warranties? What do you think?